I want to give good feedback. I want to make my colleagues and team excellent through feedback.

I want to give good feedback, but I don't give good feedback.
It's because I'm afraid that if I give feedback, my relationship with my colleagues will be bad and I will feel uncomfortable.
These fears have created excuses in my mind, such as, "Let's just put up with it, because we'll see each other in the future anyway."

The fear of feedback in my mind made me study feedback on the other hand,
It made me wonder what good feedback is and how I can give good feedback.

Today, I'm going to organize and write down what I've learned about feedback and my thoughts.

Radical Candor, complete honesty

What does good feedback look like? Silicon Valley Team Leaders introduces four types of feedback.
And they say that the type called "complete honesty" is good feedback.

Deliberate Falsehood (No personal interest, No direct opposition)

It's a way of showing that you don't care about the other person and don't want to give feedback.
In this case, it refers to silence without any feedback.

If there is no feedback at all, the organization cannot grow.
Let's take an interest in our colleagues and watch them. And let's give feedback.

Destructive Empathy (Personal interest, No direct opposition)

It's a way of showing that you care about the other person, but you don't want to say anything that opposes them.
It refers to hiding direct feedback for fear that the other person might get hurt.

If this kind of feedback continues, the other person will continue to have shortcomings without improvement, and
You, who are giving feedback, will also end up exploding with your frustrations about the other person.

If you care about the other person and have feedback to give, don't hesitate to do so.
It may be uncomfortable right now, but this feedback will eventually make both you and the other person grow.

Unpleasant Attack (No personal interest, Direct opposition)

It is a way of showing that you don't care about the other person, but you give honest feedback.
It refers to a way of speaking out about what you feel is lacking without thinking about how the other person will receive the feedback.

Since there was no consideration or concern for how the other person would receive the feedback,
even if you gave direct feedback, it may not lead to any change in the other person.

After all, feedback only makes sense if it changes the other person, so
This type of feedback is also disappointing.

Before giving feedback, ask yourself, "How can I make my feedback well received?"

Complete Honesty (Personal interest, Direct opposition)

It's a way of showing that you care about the other person and give honest feedback.
It refers to a way of speaking after thinking about how the other person can receive the feedback well.

For the other person to receive the feedback well, two things are needed.
First, you need to give the other person psychological reassurance, such as "I'm not trying to hurt you, I want to help you."
And you need to be careful not to get confused about the feedback you want to give.

Both of these things need to be in place for it to be considered good feedback.

From unpleasant attack to complete honesty

My feedback style was an unpleasant attack. I didn't give feedback for the other person.
I was angry about the other person's shortcomings, and I gave feedback to vent my anger.

XX is wasting time with stories that miss the point during the team presentation.
I'm angry that he's wasting my time and the team's time, so I'll have to give him feedback to prepare for his presentation next time.

This kind of thinking is not good. It's just wrapping my anger in a nice package called feedback.
Good feedback should be preceded by thinking about whether the other person will be able to accept your feedback because

XX is wasting time with stories that miss the point during the team presentation.
If this happens repeatedly, I think my trust in XX will decrease.
I need to explain XX's shortcomings and the unfavorable situation that this creates, and give feedback so that we can improve together.

Feedback should start with consideration for the other person.
I was not considerate of the other person, but through this realization, I was able to improve my feedback style.

Feedforward is more important than feedback (aka strength feedback)

I used to think that feedback only meant pointing out someone's shortcomings.
But correcting someone's mistakes is only a tool to prevent failure, not to create great results.
ex) Correcting someone's spelling is not the same as making their writing a beautiful poem.

Let's give feedback that acknowledges the other person's strengths, not just corrects mistakes.
By giving feedback that acknowledges the other person's strengths, or feedforward, the other person will realize their own strengths.

Through feedforward, we guide the other person to focus on their strengths, not their weaknesses.
And we can lead the other person to develop those strengths.

I was fascinated by the concept of feedforward and the abilities it could provide.
This feedback, which allows the other person to develop their strengths, is something that can make the other person grow.
This feedback style was what I wanted.

To give good feedforward, you need to be interested in the other person.
Let's take an interest in what the other person is good at and observe them.

And when you discover the other person's excellence, give feedback right away.
The best feedforward is to express what you see, not to judge or evaluate the other person.

The most important thing is to give feedback often.

Interest in the other person, direct feedback, and recognizing their strengths are all important.
But I think the most important thing is to give this feedback often.

If you don't give feedback often, both you and the other person will forget about it.
As a result, the person receiving feedback will feel it is abstract, and abstract feedback will not create change.
This is because the human brain cannot focus on abstract words or content.

Don't hesitate because your feedback isn't enough. If you've discovered the other person's excellence, give them feedback right away.
If your intentions are good and you can convey them clearly, just go for it.

Let's set a feedback schedule.

I reflected on myself while organizing this article.
I give myself feedback for knowing about feedback and concepts, but not putting them into practice.

You know a lot about feedback, so use this strength and start giving feedback to your colleagues now.
How about giving feedback to your team members once a month?
Your feedback will help the team achieve higher performance.

I'm going to set up a feedback schedule with my colleagues tomorrow when I go to work.
And I'll organize the strengths of my colleagues so that they can discover and develop their strengths.

I hope this commitment lasts.